Has everyone you dated been unavailable to you in one way or another? They may seem available in some ways but are they also long distance, emotionally closed, won’t commit completely, or married to someone else?
Be really honest with yourself and answer the following 3 questions.
- How available is this guy or girl to me?
- Do we see each other as much as I want?
- Am I getting my needs met?
The last one is the most important question for any relationship. You need to get your needs met to be happy. An unavailable lover may meet some of your needs but they surely can’t be meeting all of your needs unless subconsciously you have commitment issues.
I know that sounds absurd to you if what you want more than anything else in the world is a loving, committed relationship. But if you’re still single because you keep choosing lovers who are unavailable to you that’s because subconsciously you’re afraid to be in a true, long-lasting partnership. To decide for yourself click on the link below for He’s Scared She’s Scared. It’s a quick read, especially if you’re frustrated with an unavailable lover. I promise you won’t be able to put it down.
I highly recommend each of these books:
Click the book cover to go to that book’s Amazon page.
If you do recognize your own behavior to be those of a passive commitmentphobe as outlined in He’s Scared She’s Scared, I highly recommend you seek professional help to heal your issues so you can finally find a lasting relationship. You could start by reading Feel the Fear and Do it Anyway and/or The Anxiety & Phobia Workbook.